Monday, October 7, 2013

A Test of Faith


*Recently, we had to write a story to enter into the fair in my town for a writing competition.  I haven't been able to write lately and I hope to be able to sit down and write about watching my first team practice soon. Until then, here's a brief narrative.
          
  It was July 7th in a Wendy’s when my world came crashing down.  I will always remember that day.  I will always remember that look on my dad’s face and how his voice quivered when he said the two dreadful words, “It’s torn.”

            I had never been so angry at God.  I did not understand why I had to be the one to sustain a major injury.  I was not the girl who thinks she is better than everyone in school.  I was not the girl who drinks and smokes every weekend.  I was the athlete who is humble and goes to church, so why did I have to tear my ACL?  Why did I have to be the one to sit out for six months? Why did I have to be the subject of pain?

            After my family and I found out I had a torn ACL and meniscus, I had one week to prepare for surgery.  During that week, I tried to push all of my thoughts of anger and fear out of my head.  That whole week, I tried to pray for a safe surgery and a speedy recovery, but I felt disconnected.  I felt like God was not listening to me.  I almost thought he just did not care.  The night before my surgery was when I let all of my emotions spill out of the little box I had been hiding them inside.  I wept and wept until it was time for my parents and me to leave for the hospital.

            Before I went in for surgery, my pastor came to pray with me.  I might sound like I had, but I truly had not given up on God.  I was just full of rage with no one to blame.  The pastor, my parents, and I all prayed for a safe surgery and for my anesthesia to work correctly.  Making bargains with God is not the best thing to do, but I was desperate.  I prayed to Him and said that if everything went well, I would tell my story to others.

            This would be a great ending to a sweet story, but unfortunately, my anger did not stop after I came out of surgery.  For about a week after surgery, I was indifferent.  I was thankful that my surgery went well and that my meniscus, after a closer look, was not torn.  One night after another day of depending on my parents to do everything for me, I started to cry.  At this point, I was still sleeping with my mom because I could not get out of bed easily.  My mom started to cry with me.  She kept telling me that there was a reason that this happened to me.  Honestly, I could see no reason why I should not be able to play the sport that I loved for six months.  What could possibly be the reason for that?

            Two months later, on September sixteenth, I can finally say that I know the reason I tor my ACL.  After an ACL reconstruction surgery, a patient has to attend physical therapy for six months.  Once I went to about my fifteenth therapy session, I knew physical therapy was my calling.  During this experience, I was led far away from God.  After finding my way back, I am now a stronger Christian than before.

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